First of all, Happy New Year, World! Every year, we make resolutions, some of us keep them, some of us don't. As we head into 2012, the year that's supposed to change it all or maybe even end it all, I found myself waking up with one thing on my mind and that is 'wiping the slate clean'. I don't mean just saying, 'Ok, I'm over it', I mean, literally erasing the past things that people have done to affect my life in a negative way...is it possible? I don't know. But, when I wake up with only one thing on my mind, it's usually God speaking to me.
How do I know that God's speaking to me? Well, it's not like he's talking to me in his booming voice with directions to take, but there's a definite feeling and a peacefulness that comes over someone who is being spoken to by God, an understanding without having to understand and just a time of actually feeling as if you're carrying nothing on your shoulders and when that happens, you should listen, because change is coming your way.
It would suprise some that I believe in God, but guess what, I do! Some would even wonder how is it that I've made the choices in my life if I believe in God...and to that, all I can say is that it's between me and God. My faith as is yours, is strictly an individual thing. When you can create a world filled with animals, people and all the plants, fruits and vegetables needed to sustain millions of people over time, then I'll defend my faith to you, until then, cast your judgements to the wall, because I'm not interested. All that of course, had to be said, because like with all things, there will be people who are skeptical of either me or of God.
That said, where was I? Ah, yes, wiping the slate clean. I have been through a lot, to Hell and back it seemed at times, and along the way, there were people and events that tempted, tormented, abused, used, belittled and degraded me...me, the wonderful person that I am. Ok, I let it happen sometimes. My decisions weren't always the best for anyone other than myself and even then, not even best for me. I can't continue to carry the burden of what people do to each other, I can only forgive what has happened to me, so I'd like to make that clear. This much like my blog, is all about me, my thoughts, my feelings.
So, this morning, it's been decided that anything that's happened prior to this moment, in my eyes, in my heart is gone...as if it never happened. God said to give all our burdens to Him, so there you go God, it's all You now. So, to the people out there reading this, and to those that have done me wrong I sincerely hope you don't waste this opportunity, because this is a once in a lifetime event for me. I know, I've dilly dallied with it several times, but today, I feel different. Today, I feel like it's a new millennium...weird, thought, I know, but maybe it is the beginning of MY next thousand years and no offense, but I don't want to be covered in my angst and hatred toward people anymore. It's quite exhausting.
Anyway, Happy New Year! Glad you made it home safely. I know you did, because you're reading this now :)
