Setting 'Boundaries'

According to dictionary.com the term 'boundaries' means: something that indicates bounds or limits. The word means different things as well, but today's blog is going to be dedicated to those who have a problem setting boundaries. Are you one of those people? Then this blog is for you.

If you find yourself at your wits end over people, their behavior or feeling the need to constantly please them, then you need to stop. Ask yourself 'Why am I doing this?!', 'What's in it for me?'. Yes, this is one of those times when you actually have to become selfish and put your foot down. Why? Because their selfishness is standing in the way of your happiness.

Now, that doesn't mean that if you're being told that you're doing something dangerous or completely out of character that you should just tell people to stuff it...NO! If someone is trying to show you that you're acting weird, odd or in a not so you character then take heed, they're probably correct. What I'm actually referring to are those people who, no matter what you do...THEY KNOW BETTER THAN YOU!

Trust me, I'm one of those people. Yes, we do exist and yes, we do know what we're doing, when we do it. Some of us, don't care what impact it has on your life, as long as you do as we say...then there are those, like myself, that actually take the time either before or after the fact and ask ourselves if what we just said or did was what you needed to hear or were we acting in our own self interest. You can recognize us, the latter people, because we usually apologize or try to work things out with you. BUT on the off chance that you know someone who is the former, rather than the latter, then keep reading, you aren't done yet.

The people that don't give a crud how their 'advice' or actions affect anyone other than themselves are easy to spot. They have almost nothing going right in their lives. They have tons of 'friends' with little substance, and nothing stable to speak of or to fall back on. Think about it...do you know anyone like that? Oh, look carefully, because even those types can 'appear' to have their lives in order, but do they reeeeally?

Anyway, as I tend to, I'm rambling. Bottom line is if you're reading this and are at a point in your life where you're about to pull your hair out because of someone else, then STOP! Take a deep breath and walk away. Walk away until you're cooled down enough to go back and set your boundaries...and trust me, those boundaries aren't there because YOU didn't set them in the first place. That's right, you have ownership in this, too.

There was a point in your relationship or friendship where you had the opportunity to tell the other person, 'Enough', but for whatever reason, YOU chose not to. So, you decide. Do YOU want to keep living THEIR life, or do you want to take the reigns and live YOUR life?

So, do as I say and set your boundaries! ; )